Things They Don't Tell You About: India

India is an incredible place, but there is a steep, steep learning curve that comes along with it! I have never been the type to go anywhere unprepared,  no matter the destination.

Everywhere I've ever traveled as an adult has been accompanied by a guide-book of some kind, often a phrase-book too, which I feel allows me to be as prepared as I can be, while online research helps me to assimilate the cultural differences more easily as I know what to expect from the get-go. If you've read this post, you'll know that I was pretty thrown by everything India.

So, what have I learned?

1. People Will Stare At You (At Least)

Just accept this and move on. You will be stared at, you might be approached by people who want to talk to you, or take a selfie with you. If you're a pale and pasty person, it's one thing, but if you're blonde, red, or any "unnatural" hair color, you're going to get more looks than if you're a pale brunette.

Other things you may experience is shouting. It's not meant maliciously, as in my experience Indians are warm, welcoming and so friendly. They're just curious about you. You are different after all. I've had people pull in off the road to talk to me, but I usually try to politely say no and keep walking.

I've also had people hang out of their car or busses to stare as they pass by. It's fine. It's just curiosity, and that's okay.

2. The Poverty Will Shock (And Probably Upset) You

It's not uncommon in India to see a big glass shopping mall full of high-end brands beset by shanty-villages full of huts and makeshift houses. It's also pretty common to see people washing on the side of the road in broad daylight. It's pretty upsetting to see. There are kids running barefoot, street-dogs roaming around and other sights that you won't see in the west. It's tough to take, and it is deeply upsetting, but in most cases, people are seen smiling and happy no matter their situation. I guess the thought is that it can always be worse.

3. They Will Do Some Things Better And Some Things WAY Worse

Things India does better than Ireland: Ice-cream, microwave popcorn, customer service (even if it is annoying), affordable technology, jewelry (specifically gold and diamonds), cheap taxis (Uber and OLA - represent!), bar culture, colorful everything.

Things India absolutely does not do better than Ireland: Burgers, Mexican food, kitchens (don't even get me started!), time-keeping, leaving you to browse in shops (the culture is to be helpful to the point of annoying), grocery stores.

I find almost all of the pros outweigh the cons of this country. The food is all incredible, and so so cheap! Even when we go for a fine-dining meal, it's still very cost-effective. Transport is so affordable it's actually causing me anxiety about going back to Dublin prices!!

4. It's So Much Bigger Than You Can Imagine

The city we live in, Hyderabad, is huge. Honestly, it's on a scale I really could not come to terms with until we got here. I had thought to myself that I would go and visit this place and that place until I wrapped my head around the sheer scale of the place!

For context, Hyderabad city is AS BIG as Dublin COUNTY. The center of the city, the Old City around Charminar and Chowmalla Palace is equal to the "Dublin City Centre" area in terms of size. It's pretty hard to walk anywhere unless it's under 15 minutes away.

5. Despite Everything You Will Be Warned About, India Has An Irresistible Charm

You will see trash on the side of the road, but you'll also see the most colorful lorries around. People will stop you for selfies, but they will be so lovely to you, that you won't even mind. You will be seen as "wealthy" by street bazaar vendors and they will try to double the regular price, but if you haggle, they will smile at you and see you as one of their own. Your Indian friends that you make might underestimate your ability to assimilate, but when you do, they will be so proud and dub thee "Part-Indian".

Remember, when you come here, it's a learning curve that you need to give some time to in order to surmount it. With that said, it's a wonderful country, you're going to love it here.

<3

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Things They Dont Tell You About: Being Sick

Last week I was bedridden in my lovely boyfriends house for two days before I was able to cobble together the strength to get home and see a doctor about what was wrong. I was really weak, shaking, coughing un-controllably and had no appetite. Sounds like the flu, right? Wrong! I was the proud owner of a viral infection in my lungs that, had I left my sickness another day would have hospitalised me. Aren't I so lucky?! 

Over the week I learned some things about being sick and how to pass the time when you're not even allowed to go beyond your front door. 


1. You Can Be Productive! 

Doctors orders were to stay in bed, preferably, but not to leave the house, to take my tablets, under no circumstances get cold and just be a good patient, but I get bored and I need to be doing things, so I redesigned my blog, wrote some Mochas and Benny notes and tried to keep my head focused on doing things that would make me feel like I had done things of consequence. Just cause you're sick, my dear, doesn't mean you can't find a way to be useful even if it's just for yourself. 

2. You Are Sick, You're Allowed Be Sick. 

I needed a shower, I felt wretched but I needed a shower. I needed to do something that would perk me up physically and mentally, and I deemed a shower to be just the task! Ohhhh how wrong I was. 10 minutes in the shower, and 10 minutes getting dried and into clean jammies meant I had to sit down three times to regain my strength. Well, who knew I had an infection in my lungs and breathing is pretty important to any physical task. I ask ya!!! 

3. It's Gonna Bleed Into Your Life

On day 5, I broke out of the house to attend a pantomime. My first ever pantomime. I knew a ticket had been bought for me and I had promised my boyfriends brother that I would go and see him play the hero - Prince Valiant! So I had another ill-fated shower, I got my grown up "well people" clothes on, wrapped up and told everyone to screw off while I went to the panto. It was fabulous fun- except I had to bring my tablets, Broncho Stop pastilles, jellies to suck on and a drink so I didn't expel a lung when I inevitably coughed during the pivotal scene! 

4. Work Wont Miss You

This is the one I struggled with the most. I work in a busy bakery and my job is important to me, my cake fridges are important to me and I need to be working. I just need to be. So when I rang in sick the first day, I felt like crap in every regard and I was upset that I was letting other people down, When I rang the second day, my boyfriend offered to do it but I just texted work and told them I was very simply unable to be a human and that I was going to see my GP. The GP gave me a cert, made me take time off and I had to get on with the task of being sick. Turns out - work didn't even miss me, despite my bleary texts to management apologizing for leaving the boys in the turd. You can be sick, your work will understand - so stop worrying about it! 

5. Netflix is Bae! 

I watched plenty of absolute drivel over the course of 4 solid days in bed - GBF tops the list of crap though, it was a fun mindless watch. I also wasted a few brain cells on Eat, Pray, Love, though I admit I fell asleep before there was any praying or loving done!! What I found on Day 2 was Downton had new episodes and I loooooove Downton Abbey to death so I got to catch up and now I'm only one season behind, so if I hadn't been in bed sick, that wouldn't have happened. I also got to watch a lot of old movies I downloaded and rewatch The Gilmore Girls for about the 10,000th time! 

So there you have it, things you should know about being sick. I wont bore you with the details of my sickness beyond the fact that it was crap and all I have to show for it is a lovely new blog design and this blog post!! 

Xo, Amy

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Things They Dont Tell You About... Dieting

Dieting. Probably the number one topic on all our minds in the new year is losing that Christmas weight. Now, dieting is all very well and good, but there are plenty of things you haven't been told about the process...

Image: Google Images

If it really worked, you'd only have to diet once. 

Dieting is a great thing. Go on a healthy eating kick, lose the sugary crap and eradicate the fizzies, hurrah for you and your newly build temple to good health. However, if it really worked like we all think its supposed to, why do we spend so much of our lives trying to shift that last five pounds, when when we've it shifted, going back to our old ways. Diets may work, but they don't work like you think they do, and they certainly don't work for a long period of time.

Dieting might be a great theory, but the practice will suck. 

Sorry to be a Moaning Myrtle here everybody, but diets are only good on paper. I have read up on countless diets over the years, trying to lose my belly fat, and what looks great on paper winds up in an Eddie Rockets binge three weeks in. Find the balance that works for you, stick to that and don't bother with the Atkins or the GI. You'll hate every second of deprivation, so don't even try it. Cutting out something entirely is a recipe for disaster... if you want to get rid of something, wean yourself off it.

Sensible choices win out every time. 

I'd love to have a lean, amazing body like all the Hollywood A-List celebrities do, but do you know how hard they work on their diets? Some of these people don't even do it themselves, they have people to cook for them, to keep them on their diet plans!! How are you meant to measure up to that?? You're not. Make smart choices, instead. For me, that's no added sugar, no added salt, very little bread, brown alternatives where I can for rice and pasta, padding out meals with vegetables, and keeping my fitness up. For you, that might be as little as ten squats in the morning while the kettle boils, green tea and lemon instead of Lyons on weekdays, and a Caesar Salad instead of a panini at lunch. Little, buildable choices make for a much more sustainable lifestyle.

You are allowed to slip. 

Did you know you're allowed to fall off the wagon?? Even as I type this I've fallen off the wagon but every day is a new chance so make it count. Every morning I used to have the strongest, sweetest cup of Lyons gold blend you can imagine, with milk in it. Now I have herbal tea, no milk, no sugar, and that in itself has made me feel so much better. But I do enjoy Mint Crisp Dairy Milk. I love Manhattan Popcorn, and I won't ever turn down Club Orange. Slipping is proof you are human, and its okay. If you eat clean 3 meals and 3 snacks per day, 7 days a week and one day you just crave a Turkish Delight? Have the Turkish and enjoy it, because guess what? It's okay!!!

If you have any suggestions for a TTDTYA post, please leave me a comment!! 

Amy

xo

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Things They Don't Tell You About... In Laws

In Laws... I know you shuddered reading those two tiny words, you can admit it to me, because I do to. Anyone in a longterm relationship can understand; The In-Laws are an ever present fixture in your life, whether you know it or not. 

Image: Valley Girl Gone Country 

Before I go into this I must preface this with a disclaimer. I'm in a relationship for almost four years now, and I refer to his Mam as the MIL. That's just handier for me than anything else. And since this relationship is a stable, loving and has been very much maintained over the last four years, I can confidently make the assumption that it's not going anywhere any time soon. So with that said, I'm going to get into it. Lord, here we go!! 

You wont ever be good enough...

You may have been working under the guise that his or her mother and/or father loves you. You're a shining beacon of love and stability for their child, after all. But they don't. Yes they may be extremely fond of you, think you're amazing as a human, but most of the time parents are never happy with their son or daughters partner. If you're going out with the oldest or god forbid an only child, you're up shit creek. Sorry, but there it is. You could be married for 10 years, have 3 kids and be as in love as when you were starting out, and you wont ever be good enough for their firstborn. You might as well accept it now. Unless you take a bullet for them, you're always going to be "upgradable" in the eyes of the In-Laws. 

You are allowed to hate them...

Personally, I've nothing but great time for C's family, but there are those of you out there not so enamoured by your OH's folks. I promise you, that is 100% okay. You are allowed to not like them, you're allowed to hate them. What you're not allowed to do is to bitch about them to your OH. They wont thank you for that insight. Yes the MIL might rearrange your kitchen cupboards or comment that the newly polished mantel is dusty, but you just need to find a neutral source to rant and rave to. If I have to rant, I'll always pick someone who doesn't know the parent I'm ranting about, and go at it like a woman possessed. Hating them is absolutely okay, but you have to let it out to someone who your effing and blinding wont hurt. 

In Laws have in laws... 

It seems like the world is adept at forgetting that to be an In-Law, you will probably have had to have an In-Law experience yourself. You could learn a thing or two from yours. If they're awful, just plain mean and you despise them, do everything in your power to remember how they made you feel, and then use that to be the best In Law you can possibly be when the time comes! If you're having a great time with yours, then aspire to be like them in the future. The cycle doesn't have to remain the same. If you hate them, cling to this and remind yourself that you hated the whole debacle, so your kids wont have to worry about you being an arsehole to their spouses. 

There you have it, 3 things that don't crop up as common knowledge about your Mother and Father in Law. 

I hope this helped, or at least was mildly enjoyable to read! 

If you have any other topics you want me to cover, just name it below! 

Amy

xx

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Things They Don't Tell You About... Tattoos

People will always tell you all the things you should know about getting inked, the pain, the after-care, etc! But there are things people don't tell you. I don't claim to know it all, I'm not heavily tattooed by any standard, but I've enough indelible doodles on my body to know a little bit. 

Image: Ravenhart @ Deviantart via Google Images

People will look at you. 

Maybe in a negative way, or maybe they're admiring that amazing vibrant mandala on your elbow, but they will look, and possibly stare... They may pass comment too. That one can be more hurtful especially when it's negative, but you might as well be prepared. If they pass comment, just remember that they're usually not trying to be rude. 99% of people who've commented on my ink since I was 16 have not actually been arseholes, rather, their comments make them just seem like an arsehole. Do not rise to the person(s) who are looking/staring/commenting. 

Regret is okay. 

We as humans don't know what tomorrow is going to bring, much less ten years down the line, or by the time we are eighty. You might love your new old school sparrow today, tomorrow and for the next ten years, but if the day comes where you don't love it so much any-more, well, contrary to the prevailing opinion, that's okay too!! I've six (or eight, depending on your perspective) tattoos that I've accumulated since I was 16, and I'm going to say this right here, I kinda, sorta, maybe a little bit regret ONE of them. And even in saying that, regret may not be the right word. It's just not as great as it could have been. If in future I decided that I don't want it any-more, it's cool, I can get it lasered off or covered up. Never let anyone tell you that they "told you so" when you were twenty that you would regret it one day, that's not their place, and frankly it's rude and ignorant. 

Some people wont like your body art, and may ask you to cover it up. 

This one is not included in my first point because it's not the same. Out on the street, do what you want, wear what you want, nobody can say anything. However, if your lovely mammy or daddy or anyone who is a static part of your life has an issue with your body art and they broach the topic in a respectful manner about keeping it under wraps, you might be as well off to work with that person. Take work as an example; In my job, my boss doesn't really have an opinion on tattoos, they just are. However when he asked me nicely would I mind covering them in work, I was more than happy to comply. Why? Because I'm sound, and I understand that not everyone is as nice as he is about them. 

You're not a unique snowflake (No I don't mean it like that) 

Of course, there are instances where you have a 100% custom piece of work done and it's one of a kind, but all around the world there are people getting inked at all hours of the day, and there is going to be someone who has something similar, maybe the same subject matter or theme. You might think your lego superhero sleeve is the most original idea to come to light, but there's always gonna be a guy who has something the same or similar. You may be the only person with a certain combination of pieces, but no way are your individual pieces unique... sorry! Unless of course its a portrait or something, I suppose! 

Facebook messages will abound...

Sometimes when you're reasonably well coloured in, people will message you on Facebook totally out of the blue, including a link to some corner of the internet with something like "What do you think about this for my ankle?" underneath it... And you'll be expected to advise said person on the placement and design of whatever they're thinking about getting. Rest assured that the person wont get it, and will message you again in 6 months time with a new idea. 

Anything nice will surprise people...

You have a good job and you're rocking a chest piece? You mean you're not sitting on the dole having the taxpayers pay for your body art?! Wow!! You have a strong religious faith and have a set of sleeves?? No way!! You have 3 lovely, charming, well mannered kids and a husband who love you and respects you? How can that be?! People don't expect high achievement from tattooed folks even in this day and age. They don't expect eloquence or manners or any nice qualities in general... It's so annoying. I can have tattoos and still be a moral, ethical, polite and well rounded human. In fact, you probably wont find nicer people than the coloured in kind! 

I hope that this was mildly enjoyable to read, and I hope you enjoy my TTDTYA... series! 

Leave a comment down below if there are any topics you want me to cover! 

Amy 

xx

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